Let us have everything "they have" except pensions and salaries.
Who said that the crisis is a disaster? The vertical has got accustomed to it. It has taken at close eye at and considered all pros and cons. And there is nothing wrong. It is livable. And one can think it out that the life is prosperous now. Everything's fine, after all. Especially with higher officials. Troughs were shaken. Visitors exclaim what a rich country! A wise leader has already noticed this and concluded that everything should stay the same.
There's just a problem with people. They grumble. They resent. They ask brazenly: where is the way out of the protracted crisis? It does exist! There are good reasons for 23 years of work of the authority. It stubbornly led the country into a bright future. And here we are. This autumn, as it was promised, the people could witness heaven shining like a jewel.
Those who studied during the Soviets cannot but know that there are three constituent parts of Marxism. The ruler diligently inspected the territory under his jurisdiction and came to the conclusion that three fundamental parts of the local economy should exist in nature. And if everything is brought together like in The Fifth Element a miracle will happen. The country will blossom and begin to be fragrant. The people will be immensely happy. Pensions will be decent. Salaries will increase in a moment and reach $1500.
And this is not an idle fantasy. Everything has been thought out, calculated and weighed. There will be much money in the treasury. It is only left to rope in three powerful horses of the regime economy. And the leap will be so powerful that the country will reach a bright future in a moment which the party led everyone to, but the goal was not reached - it suddenly ran out of food.
So, our first stimulus to progress is, of course, the people's favorite decree No. 3. It is still valid. It is just sent for revision. And it is maturing. After the first unsuccessful edition it has been thoroughly edited, amended and painted in a cheerful red-and-violet color. It is possible that this masterpiece of a local bureaucratic thought is made public by the anniversary of the Great October. To know and remember what they fought for.
The country is all on end. What will happen this time? What is the next surprise of our wise power? The first edition should have proved that spongers are the main problem of our country. This large crowd slowed down our rapid growth. Let them be responsible now. They could finally lead the economy out of the crisis. And they will fill the treasury with these missing billions of dollars the ruler still not able to bring the country to the promised prosperity without.
The second component of the grandiose plan is simple and understandable. It goes back to early years of the Soviet power when it was successfully implemented by the Bolsheviks. One just need to take a bourgeois and lock him up. And to make him voluntarily pivot from his money. There is no need to come up with questionable tales, as if this is a long story. This experienced method was tried to be introduced before. People were captured and locked up. Not bourgeois, of course. They do not exist here for long. But here are businessmen. Those who are so carefully preserved by our power promising them all kinds of blessings. In the meantime, it locks them up. It's a vicious circle.
But the third component of the current progress has recently arisen. As a special way of rapprochement with Europe. The country is waiting on a hundred percent payment for services of native housing and communal services. To live like Europe does. Except for pensions and salaries. With all good impulses and other tricks, they remain at the same African level. This is our stability which the regime values so much.
An immediate breakthrough to a hundred percent payment, according to the plan of the Drazdy strategists, should finally remove all barriers on the way to Western credits. And although the country is already drowning in the debt pit, no one really cares about it. .
The system seems to be effective but it brings no money anyway. It's possible it will be later. As soon as plans for expropriation reach the desired scale. But what to do now? Interest payments are constantly brewing. Of course, there will be money. But later. When all three components of the most perfect economy are brought together and the energy is on. But should be done this chillsome autumn?
And here comes an invitation from Sochi. For the ruler. What a luck! He has a chance to lie in wait for Putin on a walking path or in a corridor and beg for money. A loan.
And here all these three horses come together. The rulers are taking photos for history. The rulers of the CIS countries. According to the Western ritual. A sort of anti-European Union. Fighters who have chosen their own special path. With an eye for the horde.
A round table. There are a lot of video cameras not to miss any work said by the greatest thinkers of our era. They speak of long-standing problems. The Drazdy ruler takes out speeches prepared by his subordinates. As always, he smashes someone: "Everyone knows perfectly how the relevant agreement is being worked on. Experts gather, take an old text, swap the paragraphs and send the document for consideration. In two or three months the situation reoccurs. It happens for years."
Is Sochi worth it? However, his efforts were not useless. Money... The Fund for Stabilization and Development has finally allocated $200 million. There is no reason to be happy about: the total debt has reached $15.7 billion and two of them are subject to repayment this year. Where to find it? Reforms are not welcomed. New technologies and the search for markets is a long and dreary business. That is why the insane system of three components should be on and on. And to invent new ways to penetrate the personal savings of fellow citizens.
There is only one incomprehensible detail amid this autumn paysage of maturing decree and the public debt of $15 billion: why does the ruler need this? Even the most stubborn optimist has long realized that there is no way out of the impasse. There is a wonderful alternative that could make everyone happy: a personal house somewhere in the Shklou wilderness. Overlooking a pond. And a traditional generosity of the social state in addition - six hundred square meters, where he can plant carrots. To remember heady past while watching cranes flying to the shores of far-away Tanganyika.
Uladzimir Khalip for Charter97.org