Not Funny Anymore

The people no longer laugh, or react to Lukashenka in any other way.

Well, this is it. The stand-up comedy show is over. Even the TV-spectators no longer react. The most awkward pause is when a comedian jokes and keeps silence for a moment to let the audience burst out laughing and applauding, but there is silence in the hall. This means, it’s time to go running off the stage until they start throwing rotten eggs or Molotov cocktails – depending on the degree of the audience’s outrage.

For many years, Lukashenka survived on the Russian hydrocarbons and loans, but also on his anecdotes and jokes. He flaunted with his fake closeness to the people. It was very convenient. When the people started outraging seriously about something – in the queues, at work, in the public transport, someone would always say “Have you heard what he blurted out recently?” And then a quotation like “Grabbed some eggs, butter gone” would follow, accompanied with the general giggle: “He’s so hilarious, a real comedian!” And then the people started recalling other quotations of the clown, and the conversation of angry people turned into exchange of anecdotes.

Lukashenka has survived throughout these years because he made himself an internet meme. I admit that he probably carefully prepared all those phrases about eggs, boxers, the drunk and the stupid instead of blabbering it out on the spot. This is a strategically correct stunt – to tell something like this to make people discuss it and laugh at it, so that the number of cartoons and doctored pictures would grow faster than the prices do. Then it becomes possible to promise the $ 500 salaries: this can also be used for creating another meme “find, dig, steal” – here comes a quotation with no questions to follow. You will get a funny phrase instead of money. You are free to laugh no, as no other options are available. As for the laughter, it is safe, no one comes to a square with it.

Every time when devaluations and mass repressions happened, prices were raised and enterprises got closed, taxes were imposed on everything that existed and didn’t exist – Lukashenka rescued himself with jokes. Have you noticed that he repeats himself on a regular basis? He is watching the reaction. In Venezuela, he told a journalist that this was the first time he gave an interview in boxers. Yeah, right, everybody laughs and discusses the red-and-green boxers made of the state flag, not the prices. All right, boxers work, this joke may be repeated. He repeated: “If I see weeds, I take my pants off and go cultivating in boxers”. Excellent, everyone hoots instead of outraging about the wages.

A week ago he said his boxers were made in Belarus, not imported. He thought people would laugh, drink and laugh again and would probably forget about the social parasites decree, prices and taxes after all. This time it didn’t work out.

The people don’t find it funny anymore. They don’t get distracted with a clown’s hat and some cheap stand-up comedy. When new problems appear one after another every day – not acts of God, not wars, not droughts or poor yield, but exclusively the problems caused by the state officials’ fantasy – the Headman’s insipid jokes and hilarious appearance no longer make people laugh. It’s not funny, whatever he does. Lukashenka talked for several hours at the last press-conference in order to conquer with the quantity. Long ago, when it worked, he would come out to the people for some 5 minutes, give them some cheap humor and set himself free. He could relax while people giggled, drew cartoons and made up some jokes. Now he couldn’t scrape a thing together for seven hours. The people don’t laugh anymore. They stopped reacting to Lukashenka at all.

This is the main difference between this year’s Lukashenka and all the previous ones. His speeches are no longer taken to pieces – too dull. He is no longer impersonated or mocked – everyone’s sick of him. He is no longer discussed – the people have other problems and other interests. He is no longer noticed or distinguished in a crowd of faceless officials. Lukashenka thinks he is a striking personality, a jokester, but in the reality he is a nothing, a big nothing lump with no features of age, sex or character. Neither here nor there. Just a shadow.

And now please note that Lukashenka does nothing but huffs and puffs in senseless efforts to attract the people’s attention: he cuts the administration by a third, he makes a 7-hour speech, he sends businessmen to prison by packs, takes off his pants, goes tambourine-dancing, squirms and hoots like an eagle-owl. But no one seems to notice, to react, to laugh. Because the people don’t have time for him. Like, get lost, we have so many problems and you come here with your boxers… The people are too tired, too concerned and too uptight. In such situation, it’s wiser not to show off but hole up. This of course will not help but a small delay might be obtained. This is all he can hope for in his condition.

Iryna Khalip, specially for Сharter97.org