19 November 2018, Monday, 5:03
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Dress Rehearsal Of The Last Parade

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PHOTO BY UKR.MEDIA

All dictatorial regimes surprisingly look the same.

As a rule, their leaders are tough guys and fond of tasking pictures naked to the waist. They go crazy with sports. They are absolutely certain that the country will not survive without them. They try to convince everyone that they will defend their post until their last breath.

And then H-hour comes. Or, to be more correct, a woman comes. Not necessarily the one called "Death". It may be a woman wearing a white robe. She will read results and pronounce with indifference: "What IV, honey? It's too late!"

However, this scenario can happen only if the client is really lucky. Or the way it happened to good old Pinochet who was found insane by the tribunal. These guys usually leave embarrassing. Their inner circle tends to kill them near a loo or to enter their bedroom without a sound having a pillow in hands. It's better to forget about them, their lives are a mess.

However, nothing of this kind could have happened to this power. No way. First, this power is perfect. Second, it's strong and eternal, as well as the well-known business of Lenin and Stalin. That's why the country has immediately drowned in sleep having received a consistent message. And all of a sudden, national sportsman disappeared from TV screens in late July. As if he did not exist at all. How could it happen?

Even worse, first guesses at health problems of the healthiest person in the country were voiced abroad, as it used to be during the Soviet times. This time they were voiced by the best friend and ally! My comrade had a stroke! And only then the lady responsible for the truth in all variations possible entered the game. Her answer was as strict as a gun shot: it's nonsense!

Yes, of course. It has taken twenty four years to persuade everyone that the country is a unique one once discovered in a collective farm. Evil Mahilyou officials tried to pull him as far as possible to avoid undesirable contacts with the electorate. But justice is served. And he reached the very top of the vertical out of thick darkness of agrarian daily grind. He did it! Local proletariat finally got its leader.

And it's no surprise that the country worried about five-day absence of the ruler in late July. Oh no! He was not in public for five days! Grandmas did not know what to watch on TV. And opponents to neo-communism got a nerve. They were nostalgic about the Swan Lake.

As expected, the official statement "it's nonsense!" sounded too weak being said in such an electric atmosphere. And the power got it almost at once. It was presented as if a Minsk regional chief was granted a meeting with the ruler. However, our people are a cagey old bird. That video raised lots of question: why can we see only the back of a Minsk official; why is the highest official ignored up close and personal? And his voice is weak and low. Is this a double?

And the interview of early August shook the ground, became the biggest story which finally dispelled rumours, doubts and guesses. All viewers, foreign and native ones, were shown too familiar things.

Bitter sun is breaking through the wall of ripe grain. The viewer can immediately come up that this is the place of battle for the harvest. And there is the ruler in the helicopter with a red and green stripe; he's rushing to meet a district vertical. And there are two girls who hand out him a bouquet. And he wearing a white shirt with printed dark glasses on it gives them two small in return. No superfluous movements. That was the reason why he flied there across the country.

A fragment of that dialogue with a head of the district should be presented. The official was wearing a tight tie, buttoned up dark jacket, however, like any other official. He tried and failed to sneak a word in the ruler's monologue.

The ruler: I say that you should sow everything in the district. But 85 or even 90 per cent must be sown with cereals according to the climate. Do you need potatoes?

The official. Yes, I need it for people...

The ruler. Then you should choose a field for potatoes. Do it according to the technology. 100 hectares are enough to feed the district and its neighbors.

The official. Aliaksandr Ryhoravich, you are right to...

The ruler. If you need corns and silage, you'd better find fields for it... You should pay much attention to crops which bring more harvest. Not popular crops must occupy lesser territories.

That was a weight off local officials' mind. After all, they did not know whether it was worth placing a priority on not popular crops. And the ruler resolved all the issues. And what if no helicopter with the red and green stripe had appeared on such a hot day? It quite frightens one to think of it!

Before leaving the high guest managed to give last priceless advice. "One needs to throw seeds in earth on time and to harvest them as soon as it's required".

It's all that he says traveling across the country. This is what is surprising: this agrarian showman has not yet been booed and whistled under boiling sun. Everyone is tired of his wise pieces of advice. However, he is still popular. And no one know how much time this theatre of the Absurd will last.

Nevertheless, it's not autumn yet.

Uladzimir Khalip, especially for Charter97.org