Who Buys in Tickets to ‘Heaven’?

Even officials don't tolerate this power anymore.

How is this possible? It's very simple: they are tired of hopelessness. They want changes. But it would be better if nothing was drastically changed. And life was getting better every day. It may be like that. One just needs to be patient. Sceptics and hopeless cynics claim that it may only happen in paradise. And it means that the electorate is seriously concerned about the paradise topic.

Putin was the first to feel this mood in the post-Soviet space. And he declared it openly. If a nuclear war begins, his supporters will be the first to go to heaven. It will be free of queues and other problems. The doubters had to keep silent, the commander-in-chief took the floor.

The local ruler, his partner and ally, slightly confused by the new Kremlin course, took a long pause. For many reasons, there was no point in getting involved in any disputes. But he did not want to take the path set by his elder brother. Why should he do that? He just settled down and they had a fair yield on the plot of land. And now he has to give up everything and now it's time to get ready for a journey!

Having thought about it, he found a way out. If a strategic partner with all his comrades-in-arms and family long for heaven, he, the younger brother and almost a friend, may well stay on earth with all his electorate. Not to leave the treaty of the union state and not to disrupt its forthcoming anniversary, he may start a journey now but in a special way, in a modest one. Without lofty impulses staying here, on earth. In general, this is a bad affair for the Kremlin colleague.

By the way, how does the paradise to which the ally intends to go with fireworks and abundant crowds look like? It seems that there were no doubts about it. Some righteous people are sitting on their benches. They contemplate local bushes of incomparable beauty. For unknown reasons they are sometimes given some kind of nectar. No one knows how strong it is. Can this unstable prospect be declared the main goal and fascinate the masses of the people?

There was a reason for the wise party to offer them communism in return. It's all the same, only in an accessible package. It was clear even to those who idled around searching for the meaning of life. First of all, there's no nectar. One can just go behind the counter and steal alcohol without any fear and even grab some food. No one will ask to pay. It could be like heaven. But the terms were wrong. They failed to fall within the twenty years promised.

Should we go back to that lost paradise, shouldn't we? Should we combine two great ideas? All the more, wicked Putin's December is approaching, and the elections are unavoidable. What can he offer to the electorate if there is no money?

And then the excited viewers were allowed to witness the business conversation between the governor and the prime minister. After a short pause, the head of the vertical wondered about the economic situation. The picture was so optimistic that there was no point to continue. But the ruler insisted: "We agreed to raise the low-paid somehow: the social sphere - education, the health care sector with unskilled employees. They are humans. They need support somehow. What can you say?"

This is the real care for the citizens of this prosperous country. They remembered and decided to spend little money to please the poor. But why did it happen only after twenty five years in power? Were there no low-skilled employees before? The point is different. There was no money. The costs are too high. He had to borrow all over the world to plug the hole of national concern.

This year alone, we will have to pay off $3.2 billion under public debt obligations. To make ends meet, one has to beg the Kremlin. There are tricky traps on the way for greedy and naive people. One will have to sacrifice something. It may happen in the next few months. These elections are about to come. And in addition to all the twenty-sixth year of sole power coincided with the sixty-fifth year of birth. What can he offer the electorate after many years of his efforts?

Further integration, turning into Anschluss? Sixteen luxurious residences? The standard of living of the same low-skilled employees and many other citizens who are unable to overcome the barrier of 200-300 rubles?

The real situation may be even worse. And the ruler knows it, despite the efforts of the entourage. There's a reason for him to start seeking positive sides. And surprisingly, he found! This is the bright image of the future, many generations have been talking about. And advanced philosophers even imagined him as an elusive ghost wandering around Europe.

Italian writer Dino Buzzati claimed that the entrance to hell was in Milan because the builders of the subway accidentally dug a hole there. Paradise is an alternative to this oppressive space. This August it has been suddenly discovered in our amazing country. In two places at once. The ruler was the one who discovered it in Ivie and Starye Dorogi. The paradise was not here forever. And the ruler, of course, created it. He told the surprised electorate about it.

"This is the second time in a few weeks when I get to heaven: the first time in Starye Dorogi, which is our most forested district. I was there a long time ago. It looks like a resort: there is a forest around, people are happy."

Leaders of the huge country, current imitators breathe after, had first-hand knowledge of the forests. And they sent their subordinates there. Being afraid of envy, this process was classified. And the archaic word "paradise" was replaced by the rumbling abbreviation Gulag.

Time passes, but everything remains unchanged in the vicinity of heaven. The ruler claims that all foreign enemies envy us again. And they secretly buy tickets to see the real paradise.

Uladzimir Khalip, especially for Charter97.org

If you like this article, you can support the website Charter97.org

MULTI-CURRENCY ACCOUNT FOR ASSISTANCE:

Bank's name: Bank Millennium S.A.
Address: ul. Stanislawa Zaryna, 2A, 02-593, Warszawa
IBAN: PL 97 1160 2202 0000 0002 1671 1123
SWIFT: BIGBPLPW
Name of the account holder: Fundacja “KARTA ‘97”
Purpose/title of payment: Donation for statuary aims

You can contact us by the e-mail charter97@gmail.com