Well, Hello There, Fascist Collaborator

Lukashenka got busted.

For many, many years in a row, starting with the first referendum, after which the national flag was torn from the “presidency” on Karl Marx Street and torn to pieces, propaganda has been working according to the set task. For almost 30 years it has been talking about the same thing.

Freedom Day, the propagandists tell us, is a holiday for fascist henchmen and unfinished collaborators, who must be burned out with napalm along with their dates. Propagandists do not take days off. You would open “Sovbelia” — simple and cozy, like a small Soviet apartment with a Romanian set and a carpet with deer on the wall. And there, in black and white, signed by some unknown propagandist, it is written that the darkest day in the history of Belarus was March 25, 1918, and this date is not close to the Belarusian people at all, but July 3, after Lukashenka appointed it the main state holiday, became the most important date for every Belarusian. Or “deputy” Marzalyuk on the same pages discusses March 25 as a day of geopolitical misunderstanding, at the same time educating about the flag of traitors and fascists. Or, it happens, an unknown author makes a fuss about the admiration of the BPR leaders for the Fuhrer, who then committed genocide against the Belarusian people. And endlessly, flowing from year to year, from day to day — “fascists, collaborators, traitors, Kushel, extremists, destroyed our villages under their white-red-white flag, the enemies burned down our native hut.” And everyone remembers how the protests were dispersed on Freedom Day. By the way, only on March 25 could armored vehicles appear on the streets of Minsk — on any other days of protests, from the elections to the Chernobyl Way, they somehow got by with paddy wagons and crowds of “cosmonauts” in full gear. But bringing out armored vehicles for intimidation is a special privilege, especially for those who celebrate March 25.

But now all the officials and all the punishers will gather on March 25 for a national holiday. Karpenkou and Karayeu will put on ceremonial cockades, Kachanava and Massandra will dress in lurex, “deputy” Marzalyuk will come sober, and retired Kallaur will sit in front of the TV waiting for the broadcast and show the middle finger to his former comrades on the screen. If, of course, there will be a broadcast.

This has been bad in recent years. In 2010, the center of Minsk was completely cleared of people and cars for the inauguration motorcade to pass through. Only motorcycles and a black “member carrier” slowly moved through the city. And in 2020, the inauguration was a secret — even those invited did not know about it and thought that they were being driven to another meeting on the progress of the harvest campaign. And suddenly — an announcement. And on March 25, too. It turns out that Lukashenka has been hiding his secret affiliation with the fascist remnants for all these 30 years? For decades, Belarusians have been trying to convince themselves that only the descendants of fascists collaborators celebrate March 25, and now he — the main descendant — has finally decided to come out. From now on, all the servants are obliged to celebrate March 25. As much as you like, we are not greedy, let's move over. Of course, one can assume that this is a quiet sabotage by numerous psychics, sorcerers and astrologers, without whose advice Lukashenka won’t even get out of bed. Perhaps they are so fed up with him that they decided to whisper and play a cruel joke on their client. Or maybe it’s even simpler: having learned that the Belarusians in exile for some reason decided to celebrate Freedom Day two days before the date, on Sunday, Lukashenka immediately rushed to occupy the free time in the hope that from now on March 25 will be associated with him, and not with Freedom Day. (By the way, the transfer is completely stupid: Freedom Day is not Easter, which is always on Sunday, and not a New Year’s corporate party, which can be held on any evening; Freedom Day is only March 25, no matter what.) But the first, spiritual-police version, seems to me to be the most correct.

By the way, I can even suggest a scenario for the inauguration. They should do the same as on the BPR 100th anniversary, when Lukashenka generously allowed Belarusians to celebrate in a small enclosure — set up a fence in front of the opera house, surround it with paddy wagons and riot police and drive everyone in there, including the hero of the occasion. And let them inaugurate themselves there ad nauseam.

Iryna Khalip, exclusively for Charter97.org

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