Putin's Problem Is In His Head

28.10.2026, 9:48
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Somewhere deep within the secret residences, an almost Bulgakovian “Anushka” awaits “the hour.”

The work by Soviet science fiction writer Alexander Belyaev, *The Head of Professor Dowell*, was very well known to readers of the older generation. For younger readers, the story tells of the tragic fate of a scientist who was left with nothing but his head—still alive, connected to the necessary life-support equipment.

The news that modern-day Russia has offered refuge and a chance to a Chinese doctor intent on mastering the transplantation of a ready-made new body fits perfectly with Putin’s desire to live to be 150 years old or, at the very least, to significantly extend his “strong” life. Significant sums spent on research by an aggressor state are nothing compared to the Supreme Commander-in-Chief’s time on Earth.

Yes, theoretically, it is entirely possible to extend one’s earthly existence, yet the architects of the Kremlin’s “multi-step schemes” completely overlook one detail in their line of reasoning. Its name is the brain. Taking the idea that GDP will eventually start transplanting his own organs, subjecting himself to all sorts of medical procedures, or even resort to a radical head transplant someday—one can see, to put it mildly, some unaccounted-for factors. Let’s take them into account...

Putting an elderly head onto a new and young body—the result is rather so-so. After such a radical operation, the “assembled” organism will by no means be a simple, healthy sum of its parts, but rather a suffering head on a suffering body, and many of the “introduced” components will prove either fatal or fundamentally debilitating to it. The heart will pump blood into the brain’s blood vessels at a rate that exceeds what those vessels can handle. As it ages, the brain has become accustomed to different parameters of interaction with its former body, and the new range constitutes hyper-stress that cannot be alleviated by the established practices of even the most advanced medicine. Here, I’ve listed only a few factors off the top of my head that rule out radical surgery today and in the near future.

But these are minor issues. The mind changes over the years, and even if we manage to overcome the physiological consequences of “assembling” the parts, the country risks ending up with an “eternal” monster, that is, Vladimir Putin, who already has obvious problems with his “alternative reality”—problems that are extremely dangerous for the entire planet. What will happen to the “parallel worlds” of this nuclear killer if he is “renovated,” granted another seventy years on top of those he has already lived? What will he carry forward, what outrageous stories will he tell, what orders will he issue? It’s terrifying to even think about. And he’ll surely issue that fateful order from the deepest bunker, not realizing that they’ll get to him in the end anyway, and that the deep underground city will turn into a silent grave—weighing in at many metric tons—for him and his loved ones.

He can’t see himself from the outside. It’s not about the body beneath his head, but the mind above it. And she clearly hasn’t grasped that nuance yet. These complex “rejuvenation” surgeries are, after all, a kind of quest for the patient, who—to put it mildly—is far from loved by everyone in his immediate circle. You go under anesthesia with the intention of coming out of it. Very interesting intentions... Doctors aren’t gods, after all—you can’t threaten them here…

And in principle, surrounding yourself with countless bodyguards is precisely the kind of thing that increases uncertainty, since no test and no system of mutual surveillance can rule out the possibility that, within Putin’s army of armed guards, there might be just one—and I mean just one—who knows how to wait a long time and act unpredictably, out of the blue. And even his inner circle—it’s worn out by all this madness of the “top guy”; you can’t rely on even the most reliable reliability if you behave the way Putin does.

In short, he’s trying to outsmart everyone here, too. But you can’t fool nature or God: both the aforementioned individual and the empire have, as they say, hit rock bottom. And in the case of the “Kremlin patient,” we’re probably talking about a massive embezzlement of funds. However, one can only recommend that a potential “test subject” take a small risk—and agree to undergo a long “renewal.” Somewhere in the depths of the secret presidential residences, an almost Bulgakovian “Annushka”—the one who has already managed to spill the oil—awaits “H-hour”…

Alexander Adelphinsky, kasparovru.com

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